Steve: I was in the Sun Newspaper, someone told me. Actually my mom. I spoke to me mum this morning. Actually, she weren’t the one who told me, though. My mate told me that in the Sun newspaper…you know that Tony Blair was at the Chelsea party? Did I tell you that?
Mr. Shovel: No. That’s a kind of a big detail you missed.
Steve: Oh, yeah. He was there. George Bush’s poodle. George Bush’s chia pet. He was there. Snoop Dog was there and the tennis player, the bird with the nice, round ass…
Mr. Shovel: Did they sneak off to the bathroom together?
Steve: Ahhh zhhheah. They went into the bathroom for a bit a shinizzle. I think he put some shinizzle up Tony Blair’s nostril.
Mr. Shovel: Tony doin’ a little endo?
Steve: Ahh zhheah. Serena Williams, she was there. I was there. I got a mention in the Sun newspaper. Next to Tony Blair’s, the chia pet.
Mr. Shovel: Sippin’ on his gin and juice?
Steve: Ah, got my mind on my money and my money on my mind…
(they do some Snoop impressions)
Steve: He lives at Number Ten Shnizzle Street in London. We’re gonna continue with the covers. Did I tell you I’m having a vacation at the end of this week? I’m going to be gone. Did I tell you that, Shovel?
Mr. Shovel: No.
Steve: Yep, I’m going to go on a road trip.
Mr. Shovel: Really.
Steve: Yeah. I’m going to take pictures, as well. Maybe I’ll send the pictures in from…
Mr. Shovel: From your Helio?
Steve: Yeah, from my Helio, from different locations.
Mr. Shovel: You gonna drive that Prius?
Steve: I’m gonna drive the Prius and I’m gonna take my Virgin records with me and I’m gonna…
Mr. Shovel: Play your cd’s.
Steve: Play my cd’s and I’m gonna be on my Helio and I’m gonna…what else do I do? There’s something else…that’s it right, for now?
Mr. Shovel: Yeah.
Steve: Yeahhhh. That’s what I’m gonna be doin’. Maybe I’ll be stopping at McDonald’s, if they want to endorse me. (makes yumyum sounds)
Mr. Shovel: I’m sure they have Coffee Bean and Tea Leafs all across the country you can stop at…
Steve: I wish they had In-N-Outs, that stops at Vegas, baby.
Mr. Shovel: Well, we happen to have a bet that you’re going to stop at Vegas, too.
Steve: I’m not telling…I ain’t telling no one where I’m going. The Navy Seals might see me. I heard there’s going to be one of them reconnaissance planes following me.
Mr. Shovel: Yeah. Eye In The Sky.
Steve: Yeah, just to make sure nothing, no harm comes to me.
Mr. Shovel: The Jonesy Drone.
Steve: Yeah. Cos, you know, down South there, I don’t want to end up like the old “Deliverance”, tied to a tree, going (squeals like a pig) “Eeee! Eeeeee!”. That could happen. It happened to Burt Reynolds and he was a big bloke. Actually, it didn’t happen to Burt, it was the other one, wunnit? The fat one? Oh, I guess that’s me, yeah.
Mr. Shovel: Ned Beatty. Yeah.
Steve: Okay. Should play some music. Um, should I do a song? What should it be about?
Mr. Shovel: Your road trip.
Steve: Oh yeah. Road trip, okay. Uh, should I play it with the harp? Do you fancy a bit of harp?
Mr. Shovel: Sure. I fancy it.
Steve: Let me put me harp on.
Mr. Shovel: It’s a fancy harp.
Steve: I’ll show that G Love geezer how to play harp. He was pretty good. Did you like him yesterday?
Mr. Shovel: Mm hmm.
Steve: Uh oh, I have to take me headphones off first. Oh, my bleedin’ hair’s getting too long. It’s getting caught in the…in the thing. What do they call these things? Harmonica holders?
Mr. Shovel: Yeah.
Steve: I’m sure there’s a proper name for it. Echo, please.
(after a guitar and harmonica intro, he starts to sing)
I am taking a road trip in my Prius
From Toyota of Huntington Beach
And I am taking my Helio
Down to the rodeo in El Paso
I hope there’s a Virgin Megastore
On the way hey hey hey
I might get thirsty around near Atlanta
I hope they have banana
And Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf
I think they have ‘em everywhere
Even in Texass
What else can I whore myself out to
I’m sure there’s a lot of things
If we look into it
I like Beano and I like pints of lager
And I like fish and chips
And I’m fond of pie and mash
Come on, let me have ya!
Everybody, do you want a piece of
Jonesy On The Road
He’s going across America
Selling everything he’s got
He’s even got his old t-shirts
For five hundred dollars
He don’t care
He don’t hang on to a thing
He don’t get attached to anything
Oh, it’s been fun
I can’t complain
I don’t care what I’ve done in the past
Now I’m looking to the future
It’s good but I don’t think it will last
Oh lordy oh lordy
I think I’m gonna become a pastor
In the pastures
I’m gonna sell religion
You can be one of my disciples
From the Jonesy Chapel Of Love
Praise him, oh you must kneel before him
And take that thing they put in people’s mouths
It looks like a biscuit, what do they call that thing?
You must confess to The Pontiff
I want to hear all the gory details
Then I’ll go back into my chambers
and have a wank
Oh praise me
Oh lordy there’s no such thing
As heaven and hell
Don’t buy that stuff
It’s just to control the masses
Just be yourself and you will be all right
Just do the right thing
You know instinctively
What the right thing is to do
If you’re going to throw your money
Down the drain
Throw it this way to Jonesy
C’mon baby, you know what I’m talking about
~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Interview with Joe Cole
Steve: On the phone right now, live from UCLA, we have Joe Cole. Joe?
Joe: Hello, Steve. How you doing?
Steve: How are you, mate?
Joe: I’m very good.
Steve: Is Mourinho flogging the bollocks off you?
Joe: He is, he’s got…we’re doing double sessions every day in the L.A. heat and it’s taking it’s toll, but you need to do it this time of year to get your fitness in.
Steve: He’s trying to get you ready for the Premiership?
Joe: He is, yeah and it’s a great place to come and do it because you got, you know…we can move around the streets, we’re not too well known, you know and it’s very relaxing and we had a few trips down to the beach as well in-between training so its, we’re really enjoying it.
Steve: Nice one. I heard that they laid down whole new grass for you lot at UCLA.
Joe: Yeah, they did but it’s taken a battering cos we’re training twice and so it’s pretty much cut up now, like some good old-fashioned England, English pitches.
Steve: All you need now is a bit of rain.
Steve: Sling some mud at each other.
Steve: I dunno where I heard it, but I think it was on the Chelsea website that, when you guys come over…did you suffer from jet lag?
Joe: Yeah. Well, I didn’t because I’d come out for holiday in Miami the week before and I met up with the squad straight after. But yeah, the boys have been (?) jet lag. I think some of them still are. I mean it’s, cos you’re going into the training so there’s no time to adjust your body and that. So…when we fly back we’ve actually got to fly straight to Holland more or less, to play a friendly so it’s a very busy time of year for us.
Steve: Right. I heard something about some of the players were wearing special socks or something.
Joe: Yeah, blister socks what the marathon runners wear. There’s all sorts of precautions taken. I mean, people probably think a blister is nothing at all, but it can be…when you’ve got to train and twist and turn and you get a nasty blister it can be quite painful so yeah, we do get pampered a bit with all sorts of special socks and things like that.
Steve: Yeah. No, I thought the socks were for like, for jet lag or something.
Joe: Ohh…the jet lag ones…well, they’re flight socks. They look like big tights. We got them as well like I said, they make sure they look after us properly.
Steve: I want to get a pair of them tights.
Joe: I think you’ll look well in them, mate.
Steve: Yeah with my skinny legs and my beer gut, yeah. You looking forward to the Premiership?
Joe: Yeah, we can’t wait to get it started now. I mean, we’ve had five or six, seven days training and you just want to, you know, you just want to play the games and the big games and the Premiership is where it’s at. I think we’ve got the strongest league in the world at the moment and it’s great for English fans. It’s a great league to watch with some great teams.
Steve: Who’s…oh, I think that’s your cell phone going off…who’s the first game, is it Man City?
Joe: Yeah, Man City at home. We’ve got the charity Shield game in Cardiff against Liverpool the week before which is a big game you want to win because it’s got a trophy…Man City at home is when it kicks off, yeah.
Steve: Yeah and you’re playing Celtic as well right, in a friendly?
Joe: Yeah, we’ve got Celtic in a week’s time, ten days’ time at The Bridge. It’s always going to be a little bit of a – it’s a friendly – but it’ll always be a little bit…a Battle of Britain game and for sure it’ll be you know, high-tempo and lots of tackles flying in, even if it is a friendly.
Steve: Yeah yeah. What do you think of the new kit? Is it comfortable?
Joe: Yeah the new kit’s lovely. Looking forward to…we’ve got three new strips (?) you know, because they changed the sponsor…you know, it looks the part, though. You know, we’re really looking forward to wearing it.
Steve: Yeah yeah. I can’t wait to get a shirt meself. Do you like pie and mash?
Joe: Yeah, I love pie and mash. I was actually talking to a friend of mine about, there’s no pie and mash shops in West London no more. I can’t seem to find any. I have to go all the way back over to East to get some.
Steve: Well there’s one on Goldhawk Road actually, Cookes.
Steve: By Goldhawk Road Station, yeah.
Joe: All right. I’ll have to go look for that then. I haven’t found it yet.
Steve: I’ve been going there since I was about eight.
Steve: It’s still there, yeah. They’re a dying breed, but there’s still that one.
Joe: I’ll have a look at that one when I get back. That’ll be blinding.
Steve: You ever see that movie, “Quadrophenia”?
Joe: No, I haven’t seen it.
Steve: It’s about The Who and the Mods and all that. But some of it’s shot in there.
Joe: In the pie and mash shop?
Steve: Yeah. You know Ray Winstone, right?
Steve: He plays like, one of the guys, a rocker in it and he’s, there’s a scene in the pie and mash shop, actually. So you can have a butcher’s before you go in there.
Joe: (laughs) I’ll have a look.
Steve: All right mate, I know you’re knackered so I’ll let you go. One more question, who’s got the biggest savaloy in the shower?
Joe: (laughing) I wouldn’t like to say…
Joe: (laughs more)
Steve: I’ll bet it’s Drogba, innit? (they both laugh) All right mate, nice one.
Joe: All right then, Steve.
Steve: Good luck, mate.
Joe: Take care, mate.
Steve: See you later.
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
Steve: Do you understand? Do you fully comprehend the magnificence of the magnitude of all things magnetic? No, of course you don’t. You’re all buffoons, jack’napes and incubickin-slingers and things. I don’t even know what’s going on myself. My hands just walk and do the talkin’. Everyone’s confused. But it’s okay because in this day and age, we’re all dying and it’s not long to go before the magma of the magnetic minefields will explode in our faces and we will all turn into magic dust. And when the magic dust falls and settles, we will start a new world. And from that new world, there will be two people: there will be good people and horrible people. That’s just the way it goes. So if we do actually dissolve into some kind of atomic wasteland, there might be one plant that survives and from that plant will come…a cherry. And from that cherry, a little cockroach will eat it and that little cockroach will turn into a human being and a monkey will turn into a magnetic…(aside) um, what are the guys with the big foreheads…
Mr. Shovel: Cro-Magnon.
Steve: …Crag-Magnolia Man! And the Magnolia Man will find a bird and he will give her five hundred dollars and say, “Can I have sex with you and we will start a civilization?” and they will have it off and we will all start again and it will be all back to square one in no time. I’m going to visit The Duke now, you bet your candy asses. Thanks for listening.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Welcome back to chriswasanon! The number one place for extracts of that famous show, Jonesy's Jukebox. To be found on the top of your dial on Indie 103.1. So today we have the June 2006 interview with the NY dolls. June? Shurley shome mishtake. Well whatever. I was thinking about energy drinks meself and I thought of a good one you could make and market - a cross between Cricket Cola, Red bull and crystal methamphetamine. I think I'll call it Killlllllllllllll frenzy. There is a lot of that in everybody's favourite homicidal car jacker video game, Grand theft Auto. Not energy drinks, just mindless homicidal jackpot scoring. Keep that flame thrower handy. GTA is Death Race 2000 sans David Carradine and wasn't he so much more peaceful in that. "You have snatched the pebble from my hand grasshopper..."
Enjoy this slab of ice cold fresh jukebox with a beer from the fridge or a poolside Pina colada and as Tina says, there is more to come. Plus some Buzzcocks possibly. It was a quite a week as far as the Buzzcocks went for LA. There were 2 gigs, one of 'em was a real elbow bruising mosh pit. Then the band were sealed 60 feet below the ground with Steve and Mr. Shovel in der bunker for a 12 bells arama. I loved the part when Steve played with them on "Fiction romance" - that one is still going through my head. Actually "Mods Skins and Punks" goes through my head quite a lot too but that's another story.
Tina IS at the controls!
(click on the pics to find out more)
Steve: So what’s going on, men?
Sylvain: How you doin’ man? We’re doin’ all right.
Sylvain: Yeah. Where’s David, though?
Sylvain: Where’s David?
Steve: He’s here.
David: I’m enjoying…the simple pleasures.
Steve: The simple pleasures.
David: See, I’m not one of these to get all excited about energy drinks.
Steve: I think we could uh, I think…do we have energy drinks here?
Doll 3: Oh yeah…I think we’re gonna need some.
Steve: (to David) Do you want to hold one?
David: (laughing) I want…to hold one. I just want to be seen with one.
Steve: Feel the power coming off of it.
David: Yeah. I want to be seen with one. I like the one that makes you furious.
Steve: It’s called, "Furious Drink", or something?
David: Yeah well, it’s called , "Full Throttle Fury", so you can be just like, mellow as can be and drink it and then have apoplexy in a moment.
Steve: I think…who was the first, Red Bull was the first of that whole wave of drinks, wunnit?
Steve: Red Bull, probably?
David: And I guess, Red Bull when you think about it, if a bull is kind of…
David: …adverse to red…
Steve: It’s angry, innit?
David: …and sees a Red Bull, it’s bound to get really furious and there’s going to be a fisticuffs.
Steve: Yeah. And you’ll have to put big swords in his back.
David: Have you noticed, now I don’t want to be conspiracy theorist or anything, but there is this kind of mass movement toward militancy and fury. Have you noticed that?
Steve: Please explain to me.
David: Well, Red Bull, case in point.
Steve: Oh, okay.
David: I think they’re really like, trying to get people to go in the army, but nobody’s really up for, up for the gig.
Steve: Maybe they should just stop messing about and just say, “We’ve got a new drink. It’s called, The Military Drink”.
David: Yeah. “It’s called, Kill Everybody…”
(the other members of the band stop playing background music and laugh)
David: “…drink Kill Everybody and then have apoplexy as the veins in your temples explode and you drown your friends in your own blood.”
Steve: I think you’re onto something.
David: We could be Mad Ave, kind of…Mad, Mad Ave.
Steve: I think you’re onto something.
David: I think so. Let’s get right to the point. Let’s quit beating around the bush.
Steve: Let’s think about…how could the advertisement, the poster for it, look? How would it look?
David: We could probably get like, the guy from – remember Cracked magazine? It was kind of like, the Mad Magazine takeoff and it’d always have some guy whose head was exploding?
David: Oh, what was that movie? “Scanners”?
David: Remember where the guy – it’s already been filmed, we could just use that. Like, have the guy drink it and then go to that “Scanners” thing where the guy’s head explodes and everyone is just standing there, covered in guts, dumbfounded. “Dumbfound your friends!”
Steve: Yeah. And the good thing is, it’s only two dollars, too, for the drink.
David: How about a drink I’m thinking of, called - Confound The Aliens?
Steve: That’s good.
David: Yeah, so you drink this drink and then…when like, say somebody’s visiting from another planet and you start speaking to them, they say, “What?”
Steve: Exactly. I think you’re onto something, mate. (belch) Pardon me. I think you’re onto something. I can’t drink all that energy drink. Do you actually drink any of…
David: Like I said, I’ve never had an energy drink. I have had that Coca Cola and coffee drink. I have an aunt who’s eighty-two degrees. Eighty-two degrees? (Steve and Dolls laugh as he corrects himself) Eighty-two years old and I’ve been thinking about her because of the heat and I spend a lot of time with her and we’re both fairly senile. And I turned her on to that Coke Black.
David: She calls me up, she goes, “Can we get some more of that Coke Black?” I said, “I just bought you eight bottles of that yesterday”. She goes, “Yeah…well we need some more. We don’t have any around here”, and I’m like, “You drank eight bottles of that stuff?” She says, “Yeah.” I said, “Well, aren’t you like, wired?” She’s like, “What’s ‘wired’?” I said, “Well, that’s what the kids say like, when you have a lot of nervous energy you know, and you can’t go to sleep”, and she said, “No. I just feel like…” it makes her feel like, seventy-five. You know? Well, so I guess it’s good. You know, why take those simple pleasures from a elderly aunt.
Steve: It’s not fair when you get older. People push you to one side.
David: Often people are marginalized in their old age, yes. It’s something we should all be aware of and try to extract whatever wisdom we can from people who’ve been around the block two or three times.
Steve: I’m only getting concerned about that now, cos I’m getting older.
David: You know, when you get up and you – say you’re in the kitchen – and you go into the other room to get something and then when you get to the other room, you’re like, “What am I doing here?”
Steve: Exactly. That’s it, that’s it. I’m with ya. Does that mean…is that the early stages of senile-ism?
David: I think it’s…yeah, it’s like an onset. But you know, I’m sure senility kind of sneaks up on you so slowly that you don’t even really know you’re senile when you get there.
Steve: It may…yeah. I reckon that life can’t be that cruel to you, that you actually have to feel…
David: I’ve noticed with my aunt, she’s a little, she gets a little frustrated because she knows what she wants to do, but she can’t quite put it all together, you know what I mean? But we try to make her as comfortable as possible.
Steve: Does she live in New York?
Steve: In Manhattan?
David: She lives in Staten Island.
Steve: I would love to live to eighty-two. Do you think you will? Live that long?
David: Yeah, probably.
Steve: You have no body fat. That’s a good sign.
David: That’s cos I’m on the Cake Diet.
Steve: You just eat cake?
David: Yeah…and sometimes a banana.
Steve: You don’t need, you definitely don’t need a energy drink.
David: You know what I like? That green stuff that they sell. You know, like, those green…
David: Nah…it’s like, they take like, vegetables and like…
Steve: Oh, yeah yeah yeah.
David: …and freeze-dry them. And then you make like, a shake out of them. And then you drink one and it’s as if you grazed on seven continents.
David: When you first start drinking those things, it’s like your brain gets all this nourishment and it’s kind of shocking because you realize why you were so anxious and insane your whole life and all of a sudden you have this like…I wouldn’t call it, “calm”, but kind of a feeling of like, “Oh. I’m crazy, but it’s because of hamburgers and gin.”
Steve: Do you eat healthy?
David: I eat healthy in like, probably in a New York sense. I mean, you know, everything being relative. In California, I probably would not be considered you know, a healthy eater because California, it seems to me, it’s like they put sprouts on everything and a pineapple slice. They put pineapple on the pizza here. So I can understand that in Hawaii. I think an orange would be more “California” to put on your pizza.
Steve: I’ll have to tell that to some bloke who makes pizzas.
David: A pineapple pizza guy?
Steve: Um hmm. Knock the pineapple on the head. It’s the wrong place. Only in Hawaii.
David: A pineapple should go under an upside-down cake.
Steve: Is that what they do in New York?
David: Yeah, they make pineapple upside-down cake.
Steve: Why do they call it “upside-down cake”?
David: Because you put the pineapple in the pan, right?
David: Then you pour all the batter on it, right? Then you cook it. And then when you’re finished, you take the pan, you turn it upside-down and you pop it off and the pineapples are on the top. But it’s really upside-down because you made it the other way.
Steve: You’re making me hungry, just talking about that.
Sylvain: It’s a little bit like a frittata.
David: I could talk about cake all day.
Steve: Is that your…do you like…
David: Well, it’s something that I deem worthy of conversation but, (band is laughing) pizza is also something…you know, it’s probably the only thing I will argue about you know, because…
Steve: You’re the expert, cos you’re from…
David: Well, no. I’m not an expert, but I think people are really entitled to their opinions about pizza. And you know, most things aren’t worth arguing about, but probably pizza is.
Steve: My favorite one is feta cheese and spinach pizza…really thin…
David: To me, that’s not even a pizza.
Steve: It’s not?
David: No. But a thin crust…okay, let’s just talk about crust. You know, because, what you put on top of a pizza is like, there’s no accounting for taste, you know? We all look at each other and say, “My god, how can you eat that?” you know, and it’s really, it’s like music. Food and music are very similar because some people like music and you just go, “My god, how could you like that?” and it’s like you know, they’ll see you eating something and say, “My god how could you like that?” So they’re very similar, cuisine and music.
Steve: Do you like the thin, then?
David: Oh, yeah. The thinner, the better. Practically non-existent.
Steve: Yeah, cos you don’t get as stuffed, right? Cos you’ve got a lot of the other stuff on top of it. We should go out sometime.
David: Yeah. We’ll go brick-oven carousing.
Steve: Do you know the Mulberry Street Pizza house? There’s one in here, you know. In Beverly Hills.
David: What’s it called?
Steve: Mulberry Street Pizza.
? Doll: Mulberry, talking about New York, or…
?Doll: Same guys?
Steve: Same guys, yeah. It’s pretty good. It’s a pal of mine, actually. Anyway, we’ve got to visit The Duke. We’re here with the New York Dolls, you’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox, we’ll be right back. Thanks for listening.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 1031 with my guests the New York Dolls, in the studio. How are you, Dollsmen?
Sylvain: We’re doin’ pretty good for a bunch of rotten bastards.
Steve: Do you need some pick me up? Can we send out for some energy drinks?
David: No, but you know, this coffee you’ve served is really splendid.
Steve: Do you want some more?
David: No. Not at the moment.
David: I have to like, pace myself because, you know…otherwise it catches up with you.
Sylvain: I say we play a song, we pick it up a little bit.
Steve: I’m with you.
Sylvain: We stop chatting and start playing.
Steve: Let’s uh…are you friends with Tom Rundgren?
Steve: He came on my show here a few months ago cos he’s with The Cars and I was talking to about the first album.
David: Um hmm.
Steve: It was interesting, what he had to say.
David: He’s a hell of a guy, Todd.
Steve: Yeah. Yeah. It was good. I liked what he said. It was…what he was saying about how the recording went. He said it was kind of crazy at the time.
David: Well, because were like, you know…we were feral. I mean, they brought us into and we thought we were in, you know, the Shoot ‘Em Out Saloon or something.
David: But you live and you learn. I mean, really…my memory of making that record was like, there was pretty lights on the board, you know…I don’t really remember too much about it. (laughter in background)
Steve: (laughs) I like that album better than the second one. For me, the first album…
David: Well, it’s not pizza, but I guess you guys could argue about it. I’ll just sit back here and tao-out. (laughs) I’m gonna tao-out of this conversation.
Steve: Do you not like any of the albums?
David: I like ‘em all. But to me, it’s apples and oranges.
Steve: What I like about the second album is, “Human Being”, the way it completely goes out of tune by the end.
David: Cos it’s so long, by the end, it’s…everybody’s out of tune.
Steve: Everyone’s grown beards by the end of it.
David: Yeah, it was long. I think it was like, five minutes long.
Steve: Longer than that, I think. But I like the way it goes out of tune at the end. It seems like it…it sounds like it starts in tune, then goes out.
Sylvain: Well the horns keep us going.
David: I think because it was like, we started the song and then it was before midnight and then we finished, it was the next day, in Australia.
Steve: Then the heat…the heat came up in the daytime, went down at night and kind of put the guitars out of tune. I gotcha.
David: I did an interview with a guy in Australia earlier, and he says that tomorrow is gonna be a really fantastic day. He was experiencing it as we spoke, and he said, “Like, don’t like, miss it…because like, set your clock.” I said, “I don’t even like to get up early”. He said, “Well, make an exception because tomorrow? I’m here already and it is rockin’.”
Steve: You know what’s funny? I was actually talking to someone about that last night, like…how could you make a bet from Australia back here before they know what the winner is? You know what I mean?
David: Yeah, like with a horserace or something?
Steve: Yeah, exactly. Put like, everything on it cos you know…
David: You could definitely do that. You’d have to have a really fast rocket, but you could do it.
Steve: I think Richard Branson’s…
David: That’s probably how he made his money.
Steve: …building one, yeah. And he runs it on tires. That’s what he runs it on is tire…
David: Ground-up tires?
Steve: Yeah. Very interesting.
David: Well, that’s better than what they use them for in like, in Haiti.
Steve: Tires, yeah. (pause) Do you know what they use ‘em there for?
David: They make those like, flaming neckties, they call them. They put them around somebody’s neck and fill them with gasoline and set them on fire.
Steve: To…people that they don’t like, obviously…
David: I don’t think that’s a very…that’s too furious.
Steve: That’s the problem! They’ve got the drink. They’ve got the drink.
David: It’s too furious for my cultured tastes.
Steve: Let’s play, what do you want to play, then? You want to play a bit of…
Sylvain: If I could say – getting back to Todd Rundgren, our engineer on the first album was Jack Douglas, who produced our new album, by the way. So there’s a little bit of that connection there…which was recorded in ’73, that album. Yeah, I remember Todd, he had this like, cute little puppy dog and I think he used to like, walk all over the control booth and all the buttons…
David: The dog actually mixed it…
Steve: Mixed the record.
Sylvain: Yeah, he mixed it (pants like a dog), so if it sounds good, this is who we have to thank.
David: You put that record on, like a lot of dogs come around.
Steve: You can hear…
David: Say you’re alone and you said, “Man, I wish some dogs would come around.” You just throw that record on, fifteen, twenty dogs would be licking your leg and chompin’ on your toenails, and god knows what else.
Steve: You can actually put that record on when you leave the house and no one’ll break in because they’ll think there’s too many dogs in there. It’s a deterrent, it’s a deterrent.
David: There’ll be a lot of dogs around the house, waiting for you to come home,
Steve: We could sell the album as a deterrent, actually. A whole new concept of selling it.
Sylvain: Maybe it’ll finally sell, then.
David: They used to have, you’d get like, a gold 8-track for like, causing twenty thousand accidents in a car or something?
Steve: I wonder how many records of that has actually sold. I’ll bet there’s a few, you know. You might not have got paid for it, but…
Sylvain: Well yeah, they’ve been selling them for thirty-five years…
David: They sold about, probably a thousand. Maybe more.
Steve: No. No, that’s got to be a…
Sylvain: I think somebody made a lot of money.
Steve: What I want to get, though…
David: The record that’s out now that you can get, that re-release, is not even us. It’s a Japanese band that meticulously imitates the intricacies of the hilarity of that record and actually re-recorded it.
Steve: Well, they’re very good at that, the Japs.
David: Roy Orbison was good at that, too.
Steve: Um…where can I get a picture of that picture on the back outside the Gem Spa? Who was the photographer? I want to get that picture. I love that picture.
Sylvain: Um, that was Toshi. Toshi was the photographer. Why don’t you just take it off the back of the album?
Steve: No, I want to get a big, I want to get a big one. Is he still alive, that bloke?
Sylvain: Well, we’re gonna have to fix you up, then. Uh, yes, he is. He’s still around, actually.
Steve: That’s my favorite Dolls picture.
Sylvain: We’re going to have to set you up.
David: He’s a monk, now.
Steve: Thunders looks like he’s got something down his pants. Is that true?
Sylvain: Who’s a monk? Toshi?
Sylvain: He’s a monk?
David: He’s a monk now.
Steve: So, he’ll give me one for nothing, probably then.
David: He doesn’t even have anything. He’s already given it all away. (Steve laughs) He hasn’t got a care in the world.
Steve: He’s Japanese?
Sylvain: Japanese, yeah.
Steve: Do you think it’s possible though, to get one of them? I’ll buy it.
Sylvain: No, no. We’ll fix you up.
Steve: You will?
Sylvain: You got it. There’s one that’s really sweet, actually. Right around the corner from Gem Spa there was five, not phone booths, but you know, public phones…
Steve: Yeah yeah yeah.
Sylvain: …like one of those waist, up-to-the-waist type, and there was five of them.
Steve: So you all stood by them?
Sylvain: And we have, we have a picture of each of us next to, I mean, on the phone, like sort of, you know, chatting to their moms or “The Dolls Chatting To Their Moms”- how’s that? (laughs)
Steve: Yeah. I haven’t seen that picture.
Sylvain: No, no. It hasn’t been around, but there is one. It’s right around, right where now there’s like tons of you know, stalls of t-shirts and things like that. Back then was a little less…
(Syl’s words are overtaken by music as rest of The Dolls start to play “Pills”)
~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Steve: You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox on Indie 1031, it is five til one bell and we’re here with the New York Dolls. As we speak, we have one Doll in the studio, Mr. David Johansen.
David: Whoa, but what a Doll, oh man. Oh man, oh manishevitz.
Steve: The other guys are out the room. Should we talk about them?
David: Sure. What do you want to know?
Steve: Um, I don’t know, actually.
David: Yeah. Well…
Steve: I mean, if there’s anything you want to get off your chest, now’s the time.
David: Conte’s done the work.
David: Conte, the guitar player.
Steve Conte: (entering the studio) Yeah, that’s me.
David: He’s done the work.
Conte: How you doin?
Steve: Hey, how you doin.
Conte: How you doin?
Steve: Hey how you doin.
Sylvain: Steve Conte.
David: Ah, they’re back now.
Steve: Hey. We was just about to talk about you.
Conte: That’s why I came in. To stop it.
Steve: Eh, fugeddaboutit. You’re obviously from Manhattan, yes?
Conte: I live there, yeah. Been there twenty years.
Steve: You know we were talking about the drummer…
Conte: My drummer?
Steve: No, the guy we was talking about in the other room.
Conte: Frankie LaRocca?
Conte: Oh, oh. Ringo.
David: Uh, Buddy Rich.
Conte: Greg Gerson (Steve laughs), Greg Gerson?
Steve: Yeah yeah.
Conte: Yeah, he’s a friend of mine.
Steve: Yeah yeah. He comes out here all the time on his motor, he got a motorbike out here.
Conte: Yeah yeah. He’s a maniac.
Steve: Yeah. And he’s still got that little…I think he’s moved out here…
Conte: San Diego, I believe.
Conte: His family’s from there.
Steve: And he’s still got that little, little apartment in Manhattan.
Conte: He’s a high-energy guy.
Steve: He is. He has tons of energy.
Conte: Oh, man…I’d hate to see him on what he used to do before.
Steve: On what he used to do, yeah. He’s a good lad. Ah, (sighs) I’m, I’m worn out.
David: We’re going to play at…we’re in the parking lot at Tower later.
Steve: Yeah, inside the store.
Sylvain: Inside the store.
David: They don’t do it outside?
David: It would be better outside, wouldn’t it?
Steve: Only for big bands they do it outside.
Steve: Just kidding. (laughter from all)
David: Not for like, indie bands.
Steve: They…Tower on Sunset, about seven o’clock, I believe it is, innit?
Steve: Is that right?
Steve: Where’s that guy gone? Oh. Yeah. That’ll be fun.
David: Oh, yeah.
Steve: Bundle of laughs.
David: We did, in New York the other day. It was good.
Steve: A record shop?
Sylvain: No, at Tower in New York on Tuesday.
Steve: Oh, there’s one in New York? Where’s that then?
Sylvain: On Broadway. Broadway and 3rd Street. Right on the corner, I think.
Steve: You get a good turnout?
David: Yeah, we had a good turnout.
Sylvain: Not bad. It was good, it was a great turnout, too.
David: The audience, he was a nice guy. You know, he seemed well-mannered and he was fairly clean-looking. (all laugh) He didn’t applaud a lot or make a lot of noise, but he had kind of like a satisfied look on his face.
Steve: He went off with a smile.
David: Yeah, he was kind of like, bobbing his head gently…not a smile, more like a smirk.
Steve: You’re a funny guy. I’m going to play Ral Donner, tell me you think of this bloke.
David: Yeah okay. Let’s hear him.
Steve: I think I know what you’re going to say, but you might have something different to say, I’ve got a feeling. Take it away, Mr. Shovel.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~
Steve: That was the New York Dolls from their album, “Too Much Too Soon”. That was “Mystery Girls”. Before that was Stray Dog and that song was called, “Chevrolet” and then we had Flaming Groovies from an album, “Teenage Head” and that song was called, “Have You Seen My Baby?”. Then we had Cliff Richard before that, doing a song called…what was that called? Oh, man. I knew I couldn’t do it. I can get through six songs…
David: It just was a really nice Cliff Richards song.
Steve: It was a nice song, wunnit?
Sylvain: It was a pretty song…
David: Whatever the heck it was called…
Steve: “Don’t Talk To Him”…
David: To Cliff?
Steve: No, that was the name of the…
David: Oh. I thought you were commanding me.
Steve: (commanding) Don’t EVER look at him when you see him, either.
David: I would never look him in the eye, I would curtsy when I saw Cliff.
Steve: He is “Sir” now, you know.
David: I would not be surprised. I call him “Sir” when I see him. He’s a SIR Mr. Richards…
Steve: It’s actually Richard, not “Richards”.
David: I know, but in New York they put an “s” on the end of everything.
Steve: Like that? Fuggeddaboutits?
David: They say…except when you’re saying “ask”, they say “axe”. But other than that, they put an “s” on the end of everything. Except when they say, “Pizzeria”.
Steve: We had the Kinks before that, and that song was, “Where Have All The Good Times Gone?”
Sylvain: Love that song.
Steve: They have many, many, many hits.
Steve: Many good songs, The Kinks. The Delfonics before that. “A Lover’s Concerto”. The only thing wrong with that song is, it’s only two minutes long.
Sylvain: (laughing) Well, that’s as long as it should be.
Steve: No, cos the proper version’s like, three and half minutes.
Sylvain: Is it really?
Steve: They must have cut out a couple of verses or something, or the solo part, I dunno, but…
Sylvain: Maybe you got the radio cut.
David: Maybe they got tired of it and they just stopped singing.
Steve: Maybe. Maybe they run out of energy drink.
David: I don’t know if they were really expending a lot of energy at any time in their lives, The Delfonics. I think they were pretty…
Steve: He didn’t even sing, he just kind of falsettoed, didn’t he? He couldn’t be bothered to use his real voice.
David: Yeah. Well he didn’t want people to recognize him, in case he was making like, phone calls.
Steve: Exactly. Interpol was on his back.
Steve: We had Ral Donner before that. What did you think of that?
David: I liked it. I mean they had a lot of…I didn’t think it was like, overly Elvis. I mean, I think he probably could really do a great Elvis and as I was saying before, Elvis probably could have called him and said, “Hey man, I got a big session tomorrow, will you do it for me?” but I don’t think he was overtly Elvis. I heard a little Gene Pitney, a little this, a little of that. A little supercon (?) of stuff. That’s what makes a good singer.
Steve: Yeah. He’s…no one knows him. You should get a “Best Of”…
David: Sounded…kind of like a Nashville production, though…
Steve: Yeah, you were saying that. Well, it was around that time, ’63. A lot of that stuff…
David: Maybe they know him in the South.
Steve: Hmmm. You know who’s a bit fan of him is Robert Plant. He actually turned me on to him, Robert Plant. You can actually hear some of Robert Plant licks when you hear some of his other songs, you know when he does that kind of, “Ohhh…” groany stuff?
Steve: Plant, he does a lot of that. He reckons he nicked it from this bloke, see? So, if he was doing a session, he could have said to Led Zeppelin, “Hey, I’m doing a session tomorrow…can you…?” (all laugh)
Steve: The New York Dolls have a new album out. Where did you record this, in New York?
David: Yeah, on 27th Street.
Steve: What is it, a new studio or what?
David: No, it’s just all different studios on 27th Street. It just turned out that way.
Steve: It looks like there’s a lot of members in it, or is that just some other blokes just hanging around?
David: Just some people who were hanging around. You know, the entourage.
Steve: It’s very Dolls-like cover. It’s good.
David: Well, it’s a Dolls record.
Steve: You’ve kept the dream alive.
David: See, this Dolls record looks incredibly like a Dolls record. It looks like you could eat it and if you got indigestion, you could eat around the sides because it’s kind of like Pepto Bismol-pink.
Steve: Yeah…it’s good, it’s good. I’m glad you didn’t like, do something artistic.
David: No. (band laughs in background)
Steve: You know what I mean? (laughs)
David: You know, sometimes not doing something artistic is an art in itself. You understand what I’m saying?
Steve: Yeah. Well, I’m glad you weren’t on the front like, holding an apple in the desert or something.
David: Oh yeah, or like, an airplane, like a silver airplane…without any windows…with a hood ornament from Pontiac.
Steve: You could have…had the set of like, “The Streets Of San Francisco” or something. You could have went down that road.
David: We could have done a Quinn Martin Production, (laughter from all) but Jonesy, the way I look at it is, if we did a Quinn Martin right now, where would we have to go?
David: In other words, we’d be done because out of perfection, nothing can be made.
Steve: Nothing to look forward to, I hear ya. Forgive me, forgive me for bringing that idea up.
David: That’s okay. It’s definitely on the back burner but when that comes to fruition, it’s gonna be a sayonara song.
Steve: What label is this on? Roadrunner Records. Is it records, or…yeah. Roadrunner Records.
David: The Roadrunner CD Corporation and the Acme Fireworks Company of America.
Steve: And it just came out, right? When did it come out?
Steve: Yesterday, excellent.
David: The day before yesterday, if you want to be like a, a completeist.
Steve: Okay, so it came out on the 23rd then was it?
Steve: I think that was the 25th.
David: I’m not good with numbers but I’m good with Wednesday.
Steve: It’s not a double album is it? It’s a double album.
David: No, I think one of them’s a dvd of us like, mucking around in the studio.
Steve: Oh, okay.
David: Making like, secret hand signals and pulling each other’s hair.
Steve: Are you guys playing anywhere?
Sylvain: San Diego, next week I think.
Steve: Next week?
David: Some festival in San Diego.
Steve: Oh, you’re doing the Street Scene?
Sylvain: Yeah yeah yeah.
David: I guess that’s what it is.
Steve: That’s good. That’s a big thing. We did that about three years ago, the Pistols. It was great.
David: Is that anything like the one that we did over here in Silverlake?
Steve: Bigger than that. It’s bigger than that. The same kind of thing but more, more people. That’ll be great. And that’s it, or you’re not going to go on the road to…
David: Well, we’ve been playing consistently since we got back together two years ago, so we were just…where were we, we were in Scandinavia last week and then before that we were in the Benelux countries. We’re very big in Luxembourg where they cut the diamonds. We had a guy in the audience there…with payis.
Steve: Would pay ya?
David: With payis. (laughter from band)
Steve: Pay you to do what?
David: The guy who came to the show in Luxembourg. He had payis, you know those curls that you have in front of your ear that come down like this…
David: It’s a Hassidic thing. But it’s a hot look in Luxembourg now.
Steve: It’s all the rage in Luxembourg.
David: Well, at least with this guy. I don’t know. I didn’t see anybody else.
Steve: It’s the beginning of the trend.
David: All I saw was the audience which was, like I said. We get a late crowd, usually. November, December…
Steve: There is a lot of transvestites in Luxembourg. Did you know that?
David: Perhaps this wasn’t a man at all.
Steve: Right. We went there once and it was, we went to this club and it was just full of transvestites. Pretty ones.
David: Did you ever take a long walk in the Benelux countries?
Steve: Um, I haven’t done it in a long time.
David: Neither have I. I’d like to sometime. If I had like, a good pair of shoes.
Steve: I’ll have to sort you out with some…something. (laughs) Let’s go visit The Duke, we’re here with the New York Dolls. You’re listening to Jonesy’s Jukebox, thanks for listening.
~~~ ~~~ ~~~